Hemlock

wait-- where did you come from now?
it must be my mind's associations
again-- i can no longer speak
poetry without

smelling you. perhaps it is because
i cannot yet describe your scent...
it is still
mysterious
and distant

i need to spend more time
with you and your lips

then i will have a hold on this scent

and something to let go of

Noah, i think you have spent more time outdoors than i; or at least you have spent your time outdoors differently. i love the word 'still' in this poem so very much, though perhaps i love it most of all because what it creates in and for me is not so much stillness, but rather silence. because there is so much movement, change and growth, and feelings responding to-- yet again you remind me that she is still-- still. i hear only my voice when i read this poem, and then the surrounding sounds return. you are very careful with your sibilance and your hard 'c' sounds. and then the r's come in real strong, at the end especially-- which is funny because it actually moors me in the poem, it is like i am floating for the first stanza, and as the s's and c's give way to the d's and t's, then eventually the r's, i find myself becoming more and more firmly planted in the ground of the poem, and it is as though i have been brought into this space of unmooring so that i can unmoor with you.

'resurrecting' feels like a light-switch in this sense, then, because it brings all of these sounds together as the shift is taking its sharpest-- which is never too sharp, because it all stays together very nicely.

and you point to learning as a process of becoming. instead of acquiring knowledge and then becoming a knower, you say, as rajneesh would, "i am not a knower, i am not someone who is learning, rather i AM my learning, i become with the process of knowing." i am not someone who possesses something learned, rather i am the very process itself.

you are fighting the subject-object split, too, in your solemn way. you press against your beard her coarse skin-- you don't press up against the object, because you are becoming with her, you are both one in this moment, one subject becoming; then as you stand apart, two subjects. no subject-object. you are separate, then you recognize your oneness, and you render this, for me the reader, into the distinction of "my beard" and "her skin" -- this is for the sake of the poem. really this act is the one moving, the one becoming. but language is not like that, so you add the structure of language to it and you share with us in a way that allows you to share, and you show the two recognizing they are one, and becoming with each other, and then standing apart and coming out as two subjects-- separate, yet still one. it is a beautiful learning, a beautiful becoming.

...her death...
...the love in me, resurrecting
us...

this is the movement. very beautiful, Noah. this poem was worth the waiting.

That scraggly conifer that you have embraced with your heart, the poison that was Socrates' end, the seasonal dying of these expressive trees, and the more mysterious union that "we are our learning to unmoor" are layered resonances of loving and dying throughout all of this beauty. I can see that hemlock pushed along through that relentless cycle of seasons.

The clouds have broken again for you.

Your choice to “wrap my arms around the trunk of her” instead of “around her trunk” is not insignificant. The trunk in your poem IS her existence as opposed to belonging to her. And she is still standing, not with scraggily arms, but with “scrag arms,” underscoring your own idiomatic description of experience. She (and this hemlock is gendered) is dying but still standing strong. Like a cancer victim, she is dying from the inside out. Her strength is coming from her roots, from her structure (we might even say, character).

And you imagine yourself “squeezing out her death” as if she were Silverstein’s `The Giving Tree.’ She is here to nourish you but without any expectations of you giving back to her. You are aware of this giving and an empathic impulse is emerging in you; she is “dredging up the love in me…”. But, the poem extends outward perhaps to all of humanity, for she is not only “resurrecting” you; it is all of us she potentially resurrects “from the cold underbelly of thought.” I sense here that our insouciance to the fragile and delicate balance of life dissolves in a deepening death awareness.

This Emersonian transcendental theme speaks to a `nature mysticism,’ which emerges as an initial apprehension of the Pure Witness (what Emerson called the “Over-Soul”—please read his essay `On Nature’). This 'nature mysticism' is not only a felt connectedness with nature but with the whole World, including mankind and its culture, and is what Wilber calls an `Eco-Noetic Self.’

I also began cultivating these higher levels of consciousness through Nature, and the tree I wrote about to describe this “death awareness” you speak of was a beech tree, my favorite, and I said,

the tree, a stump,
from years of weather, twisted then fell,
no one even noticing its lime leaves
and cadent swell against the sun in May,
its branches, smooth and sloped, and grayish trunk,
too large to see the house in shade,
not the children who raced fast past its girth,
not the pulsing teens, nor throngs of lovers
who met beneath its hands in dark of night;
no, not until death did its existence
begin, taking on a life that until
that moment lived apart from other things;

The most brilliant and pure expression of this awakening to consciousness through Nature and, in particular, death is, for me, found in Walt Whitman’s `Out of the Cradle Endlessly Rocking.’ There is not a reading of this poem where I do not weep and when I am not transported beyond.

“Resurrecting/us from the cold underbelly of thought.”

Let us not lose sight here of the role language plays in this resurrection. “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” This is an evolutionary and not theistic declaration for me and draws language out of its inchoate “underbelly” of preconsciousness to its status of heightened recognition of spirituality. As Noah I think almost infers in the poem, we have a responsibility as conscious beings to tend to the delicate balance of life, of which nature being an integral part.

And to hold myself a moment buoyant,
thank you for your death, I say,
though your heartwood is too soft to raft. Yes
I say, and let us stand apart,
because we are our learning to unmoor.

This is really exquisite, Noah. “To hold myself a moment buoyant” is meditation, the floating in silence with thought suspended or, more accurately, dissolved in order to truly grasp the beauty, the depth of awareness; and awareness that identifies death (along with sexual intimacy, a smaller death-- le petit mort!) as the greatest source of spiritual wisdom. It is the “heartwood” of embodiment and, despite it being “too soft to raft,” that is, to use in some practical way, it is a rafting of a higher transcendent awareness superordinate to but including the aesthetically delightful world of nature which nourishes us, literally and spiritually. This last couplet is particularly interesting because it shifts back to the psychological necessity of being separate from the mother (remember, the hemlock is gendered) as a way of strengthening the self that “stands apart.” However, it’s a transitional stage of consciousness or development because it leads to the greater wisdom of emptiness, the understanding that we are inter-being, that is, we are all interconnected. And so, the double meaning of “unmoor:” In “our learning,” we at first separate from our parents and then, at a later point, reunite again when we “unmoor” ourselves from our selves. This is a greater mooring, for sure and one I’m sure Emily for one will be happy to know :)

I understand that Noah's poem is written in a language that differs from conversational usage. Parts of it are mysterious. They are images that leave me searching for resolution.

“thank you for your death, I say, though your heartwood is too soft to raft. Yes I say, and let us stand apart, because we are our learning to unmoor.”

Om’s literate analysis beautifully pulls apart some of these mysteries, and I respect the rigor of those insights. But, as an innocent reader, I wish that there were a way of getting to the heart of this language without rolling in the big guns of academic and historical criticism.

When I read such analysis, it lets me off the hook of the internal struggle that begins when I read the poem. I want to stay on that hook as long as possible. This struggle for meaning is the creative process working in me (stimulated by Noah). Once the pieces of the puzzle come together, I am done. I move onto whatever is next. The longer that I can postpone that moment, the longer the rich creative process stimulated in me by the poem continues. I want that.

I also want to be a part of this conversation. Since I am arguing, I guess, for a kind of silence, I wonder how that will work.

Hey, Arnold, thanks for your response. I very much appreciate it and, as i said, completely understand what you are sharing regarding this period of direct experience or engagement with an object, or subject, for that matter. In fact, meditation I believe is the purest form of that “suspension,” because it goes even further than merely subjective experience, that “hard-to-resist tendency to draw a conclusion about experience.” The moment of judgment you speak of is indeed a conceptual marker of interference. I actually see it as a point along a continuum of perceptual and conceptual interferences that exist even before judgments.

In a way, you are describing meditation, as in, “meditation on a poem.” It is your direct experience of the poem before it is interpreted and therefore named or categorized (“labeled pigeon hole”). I appreciate this because I also engage a poem (or any work of art) in this way. A poem, however, is different than a photo because of its linguistic context which, as you have painstakingly shared, a photo doesn’t have (a photo is self-contained). We can meditate on both, but the meditation experience would likely be different. Both of these meditations, however, would still be considered limited, as far as meditation goes. Aesthetically and subjectively, it’s all fair play.

If you will indulge me, I would like to write a bit on meditation, because it addresses perception and conception at their barest conditions. When you speak about direct experience (“when I begin to experience something”), you make clear that it involves a series of moments of, we might even say, “intimacy,’ because there is very little in the field to interfere with the emotions that are evoked. The mode of experience is mostly emotional and intuitive. Thinking, in the form of conceptualization, is minimized. That is, until you make a judgment, which takes the form, as you say, of “I like this” or “I don’t like this.” I would be interested in knowing what impels you to go there, but that’s another discussion.

Judgment is part of a conceptualization process that also includes naming and categorizing, an experiential mental image, fact-connecting conceptions, or term-connecting conceptions. All this takes place immediately and unconsciously, even when we think we’re having a pure experience of suspension. It’s merely a matter of degree. The idea of meditation is to minimize those erroneous, deceptive, and distorted perceptions and conceptions even further than what we typically experience in our engagements with art or lovers. I mean, the interpretive mechanism is halted!

The Buddhist philosopher, Nagarjuna, in his various writings, but particularly in his “Seventy Stanzas on Emptiness” (the treatise I’m more familiar with and which I highly recommend to everyone because of its accessibility), went through great efforts to help us understand how mind functions and how faulty thinking causes suffering. His basic premise is that consciousness is always consciousness of something. As the translator, Daniel Ross Komito, tells us, it arises and ceases as a series of moments, and that any phenomenon which arises does so in dependence on certain conditions and causes. Visual consciousness (along with all other perceptions), for example, arises in dependence on three conditions: an eye organ, an object and the actual cause, which is the immediately preceding moment of consciousness.

This is part of a stream of moments of consciousness that stretch across time and therefore has continuity. What’s fascinating about Buddhist thought is that mind is considered a sixth sense organ, but is different in that it is a responsive and reflective organ and apprehends its objects through the influence of subjective dispositions. The objects of mental consciousness (mind) include concepts, memories, emotional states, or perceptions.

With very long and practiced meditation, we will never be aware of the “raw images” created in perceptual consciousness because mental consciousness registers the objects of mental consciousness. It is possible, though and the closer you get to achieving this, the less and less suffering you will experience!

Our “thoughts” are unable to separate mental images from bare perceptions, and thus thoughts are always deemed erroneous and distorted. The objective of meditation is exactly this: to train the mind to understand its own erroneous understanding of perceptual and conceptual cognitions. This understanding absolutely alleviates suffering.

According to Nagarjuna, what creates problems with conceptual cognition is the mixing of mental images with perceptions, along with a fundamental belief in selfhood. The example Komito uses is a rose. “If one cognizes a red rose growing on a vine, one’s cognition of the rose is said to be deceived because one is incapable of separating one’s conception about the rose from the mere appearance of a red shape, which is all that is actually cognized by a visual consciousness.”

“If I neither think “the rose is impermanent” nor perceive the impermanence of the rose, I am deceived about the mode of existence of the rose, which is impermanent.”

By calling it a rose, I am deceived about the mode of appearance. These are considered distorted conceptions. What makes a perfect cognition is that it is fresh and infallible. Not fresh the way we might ordinarily think of it in its subjective form, but even deeper. Fresh means that it is the first moment of cognition of an object in a series of moments which cognize a particular object. Infallibility means that a perfect cognition correctly ascertains its object and eliminates misconceptions about it. We are able to induce certainty about objects based on valid reasoning.

I apologize for going so far into this, but it allows me to put Arnold’s response into a certain context that I would like to convey. I want to make clear that I actually agree with his response regarding the authenticity of relating, whether to a poem, an object of art, and even a living relationship with another being. I envision these experiences as a kind of spiral rather than linear because that would relegate interpretation as less authentic to relating, which it is not; it’s merely a tool or vehicle for deeper understanding so that more authentic relating can actually take place.

I cannot hear Rilke laughing. I can hear Matisse laughing when I look at his yellow curtain, but Rilke is silent—still. I’m sure he laughed; everyone laughs, sometime or other. Rimbaud is bawling, Eliot is sneering, Walt Whitman is in hysterics—hell, even Van Gogh giggles every once in a while. Some are withheld, some are over-the-top, some are joyful, others rude, still others just an act... Then there are the silent ones—Rilke, Seurat, I’m not sure I can ever hear Bach laughing (though Mozart is having a ball!)

Me? Oh, I laugh. I laugh sometimes. Sometimes I laugh a lot, and a good full laugh, one that tires me, relaxes me. Sometimes I laugh ecstatically and I come back to myself thinking, “Where have I been? What happened?” and it feels a bit shameful—I lost it. Usually my laugh is a little bit lacking; there’s a subdued quality to it... if Rilke laughed it would be forced, to please another, or else it would be unwitting—an expression of delight even Rilke did not observe. Buddha is rolling around on the floor laughing, only it looks like a half-smile and feels like true presence. Sometimes you hear true laughter, and it impresses—boy, now that’s a laugh!, and it impresses itself upon you: I remember those laughs. There’s an enjoyment in there so often out of reach—I am held back sometimes by the seriousness. I am serious about my play—but sometimes not in a playful way; I turn it into seriousness, and then I mistake that seriousness for play (and then I’m really lost!)

But life seems pretty serious much of the time, and all this anxiety to make it meaningful—to achieve something, to make something of it, to spend time in a worthwhile way. These things are important, and it seems life deserves a seriousness, that to not be very serious about life is to be irresponsible, to miss something. And we see it all the time—some people who are laughing too much are throwing their lives away, and their play is destructive, and they have no direction; what are the consequences of not taking things seriously? Though, again there is the mix-up, because this kind of play seems like no play at all—the laughter is madness, what looks like play feels like anxiety... this isn’t working; yet taking things so seriously feels heavy, a burden, so much of a weight—I can’t even laugh freely, I am taking things too seriously for that!

Where is the middle ground? Where is the space between, where we can take ourselves "seriously enough to take ourselves less seriously"?

Well, anyway, understanding is the remedy of all suffering—and I have been laughing more fully in recent months. Maybe laughter is one of the perks, and play is the path. Maybe it’s all a river, play the canoe, understanding the paddle, and laughter the pabulum. And the river is empty, of course, and maybe it’s even the unknowable—but in the meantime, since I’m still hesitant, it seems like a river to me. Before you enter the path, they say, rivers are rivers; after you enter the path, rivers are no more rivers. When you have achieved, rivers are once more rivers. For me, for now, rivers are still rivers. But things aren’t quite so serious as they once were—at least, they are so much more serious that I can relax, and play a little.

I spoke with myself this morning.

we agreed that this year will be wonderful.

it's about time, too.

I love to be adored!
But it is not for this
That I take you in.
I love to be the mysterious lover,

Beyond your reach, as you reach
Into your seeking, trusting
intuitively
that our tenderness is teaching.

I love to watch you
Breakthrough in shudder
the static of memory
and look into my looking.

I feel you letting me
hold you still,
long enough to glimpse
your innocence.

I have no idea
Where you go after we’re through,
What your mind bends around and over
or how you are.

In me you are man seeking himself.

You are a poetry major, yet I have never read your poems. Poetry is without a doubt, something that I am utterly clueless in, seeing as I am a child of prose, but one only needs eyes to see your talent. After I read your poem over several times, as one must with great poetry, I still found myself utterly clueless. Alas genetics have no role in talent. I can offer no deeper insight thank this: your love of nature is astonishing, you have a kind heart and a gentle soul, and you will see much death in your life, but you will persevere and be stronger for the loss.

2:47 and I was sitting in my free period bored out of my mind, so I started rooting through my computer and came up with this. It is a poem I wrote in my freshman year of high school. It struck me as interesting, particularly because my mindset is so similar now as it was then.

(1/25/05)

She asks.
I answer.
Why do you get up when you are tired?
Because I have to go to school.
Why?
So I can get good grades.
Why?
So I can get into a good college.
Why?
So I can get a good job.
Why?
So I can make money.
Why?
So I can live.
Will that make you happy?
Maybe.
If you are unsure, why do you work so hard?
Because I am afraid that I will ruin my life if I don't.
What about having fun?
When there is time.
What if there is never time?
Then life will be no different than it is now.
What if after all your hard work you do not want the life you have been working towards?
I don't know.
Does it scare you?
Yes.

Perhaps there were other reasons you worked so hard for good grades. Are there?

OuBenNing

Ah, I keep thinking that I wish you were happy while you were mastering music and not waiting until you have mastered it to be happy. I would think, not being a musician, that the relationship with one's music is something that takes place over a lifetime and with each peak, there is again a valley, and another peak to climb. I think people have no choice but to follow their hearts if history, fate, etc, allow it. And money..... now that's a topic. It certainly doesn't make one happy, but it can make life alot easier. It is really a question of how much you need in order to do what you love to do.

I hope that at some point I will hear your music. In a way, I already do.

Thinking about sex
I can't help thinking
about home;

coming back to that
safe warmth
in which I have spent most
of my life.

Where I first made love.
And first cried over a boy.

Lately I have felt as though
it were no longer the place for
me.

Torn between this blissful
feeling of comfortable stagnancy
and
the unknown.

I just cannot keep my mind
on sex.

I drift off and think about
groceries
or work
or the skin on the back
of my hands.

But then again,
maybe I just need a good fuck.

I had one of those unusual moments today of meeting a new friend. I only mention this because it’s one of those precious things that really opens my heart and brings me joy. Like meeting all of you, I feel so grateful you’re all in my life. It’s not any specific thing, just the knowing you’re in my heart and stretching it beyond what it was before I had met you. I find my heart to be so vast, really, beyond what I can even conceive. And, each time I read your words or think of you, or meet you, I am reminded of that. So, thank you and you and you and, especially, today, my new friend who, once again, reminds me of why I’m here, and here.

Om mani padme hum

The Logging Road

I’m saying self-delusion
is the sower
of mind's creation, and
self-love its dissolution,
as you follow behind
then beside me breathing in
the alliteration of green
against gray sky.

We are walking down the road, a hanging
valley a hundred thousand years before
was glacial floe, with the headwall
at the edge, where the kettles and caves
beveled out landscape, and bastions of rocks
like reliefs hung over what is now
the cool umbrage of wood.

We see three small birds building nests:
a yellow-throated warbler high-chipping
to the undergrowth and what waits
there; a black-hooded one
with white tail spots, behind
a beech, long-warbling with beak full,
and a goldfinch, perching down low
on a black cherry's arm, waiting, then
lifting in the time I turn to see it:
the trees bloom yellow blossoms.

Your father tells me the road was named for
the gatherers of wood a hundred years
before, as they pillaged deep into the forest
as if it would go unnoticed, the stripping land
of trees, the peeling away of wood, leaving
stumps and mutilation like nuclear waste;
he eyes his birches like Frost dreaming he could
swing like a boy in spring his father’s trees;
but your father doesn’t need to wrestle,
doesn’t need to test his muscled arms
and axe the birches to the ground.

He sees his birches as vertical altars
like totems like living gods their fingers
adorned in black ringlets, and is happy
to find the ones that had returned to earth
naturally, where he will find plenty
in the furrowed bark-husk of dead wood;
and like a watchmaker with hairspring
he will guide the goading motion of ax
against bark as sun stretches across
the bending blade.

Most of the time our walks are in silence
we are here to listen
we are instructed to learn
what works and what doesn’t
what signs and pointers pass through
the forest like the involution of mind excavating
down under its earth, like birds recapitulating
the motion of wind through wing, like time leading back;
and there is something in the sharing of silence
where history speaks wood and stone
where the floe of glaciers impressed
walls and moraines,
and bulldozed across
the landscape;
where the ice retreated
and the lakes shrank,
where the chattermarks
and knobs sculpted rock,
and plants and animals
migrated into landscape
that grew trees
and drew birds
before the road would ever bend
for the loggers stripping wood.

Between the half-crumpled fronds
and pine spurs in the taupe
and redolent rock of day, light
converges like love
from a remote depth
emerging from earth
from miles beneath ice
before ice before words could claim
that we are the aim of the universe
and from stone came art and utterance,
and from utterance came word and road….

What makes relationship so sacred is the fragility of its presence and the resiliency of the heart that holds it with the utmost fortitude and care. Open that heart wide enough and the sheer intelligence of reason will reveal the truth of its own design: to guide the heart through a most strenuous journey toward the light.

If I had something to say tonight I would say it. It's quiet. Just sit here beside me. Let me look at you for a moment. It's all I need.

I sit here amidst words, thousands
upon thousands
of words, all pointing
the way toward Paramita, that
other shore across the sentient sea. And

these words delight me, as toys delight a child.
My father gave me
words, for that's
all he could give. Words
were my father's presence: "Don't ask

for anything other than presence. Don't speak
of a `you' apart
from That. An empty
container cannot be more full.
Be whole, and nothing."

What actually appears to us as present moments
is nothing more than what happens during these
moments, the constant changes occurring which
we identify as present. It is an infinite string

of occurrences, but never “this moment,”
which only is, if we only open ourselves to it.
This realization came to me today as I looked back
at something I had written 15 years ago. As I
read it, I realized that everything still is, right
at this moment, even though the contents of
time have radically changed. It was a powerful
realization, a sharp contrast of the evidential
against direct experience. Clock time watches
me shift into “middle age,” and all the external
changes of time unfold before me, including
my death at some point in the future. There is
much evidence to qualify this. But, my direct
experience tells me that everything I perceive
external to this eternal presence of now--
consciousness itself-- is illusory; it exists but
is not real.

What makes time seem real is our identification
with the contents arising out of consciousness;
this is ego, what the Buddhists call ignorance.
This is why I sit day in and out, to stop the
traffic in my mind from tricking me into its
appearance of reality. Suffering is only this.
The moment the traffic stops, time dissolves
with it and in its place is Awareness. I used
to spend my days existing and wasting time;
my focus now is only awareness and ending
time. Even when I step out into traffic, I find
awareness pulling me back with its finger waving.

looking back as a way of looking forward, looking forward but really looking back. Nice to read this tonight, Om. A reminder to me.

This moment is the journey.
To believe otherwise is to leave hope bereft of joy—

session of sitting ;)

You mentioned having difficulty finding your way in, I hope that's not the case. What's going on out there in the Midwest and in the classroom(s)? I miss your posts and poems and hope you make your way back!

Sometimes I don't know anything, not even what I am going to do when I leave my desk. I sometime think if everyone I love is doing well, then I'll be just fine, as if I have no boundaries of my own. Is everyone well? In the midst of doubt do you have hope? It is alright if I just sit on my bed for hours and stroke the cat or just stare out the window at the woodpecker on the tree across the alley? What does a day add up to? How do you measure the meaning of a day? What are you doing? If I could reach out and touch you, if you could tell me that you are fine, that you will be fine, I could rest, but that makes me dependent on you and if that is true, then I can not be what I want to be for you, for me. You have to be free to flounder the way I flounder and to fly when you can. I would absorb your pain if I could. As self destructive as it is, I would take it in, take it from you, if I thought it would help. Taking in your pain, frees me from my own. I want you to know all the things that I don't and to be free of the struggles that hold me.

I am going to leave my desk. I am going to look outside. I am going to ask myself, " What's next" and choose a direction .

She said, Beyond that we have nothing to talk about. I
see myself a diver on a cliff, arms outspread, holding the sky.

My hands are the sunlight. Pushing outward from knees bent, I
fling into the air in an arc of nothingness. I am beyond what I

was and will be, suspended. There is nothing but the eye
of storm in a space beyond fear, beyond the lifting off, the fly

of body in space around a world that neither exists beyond I
nor the staked claim of its existence below the outspread sky.

My arms open to a love that has claims to stake beyond its reach. I
om the words that seek, and in that space of love the words before me die.

Ghazal, in poetry is a form consisting of five to fifteen couplets (sher), which share a rhyme and a refrain. (The word "Ghazal" is pronounced roughly like the English word "guzzle". The ancient form originated in the 10th century in Persia (modern day Iran). It is derived from the Persian qasida, which in turn derived from an Arabian form that can be traced back to the 8th century. Ghazals were written by the Persian mystics and poets Jalal al-Din Muhammad Rumi (13th century), Hafez (14th century), and the Turkish poet Fuzuli (16th century).

The Ghazal spread into India in the 12th century under the influence of the Mughals. In India, Mirza Ghalib (1797-1869), Altaaf Hussien Haali (1837-1914) and Muhammad Iqbal (1877-1938), were the masters of Ghazal in Urdu as well as Pharsi (Persian) . Although the Ghazal is most prominently a form of Urdu, Hindi and Punjabi poetry, today, it has followers and writers in many other languages.

Through the influence of Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832), the Ghazal became very popular in Germany in the 19th century, and the form was used extensively by Friedrich Rückert (1788-1866) and August von Platen (1796-1835). The Kashmiri-American poet Agha Shahid Ali was a prominent proponent of the form, both in English and in other languages; he edited a volume of "real Ghazals in English."

The Ghazal is a common song form in India and Pakistan today. Strictly speaking, it is not a musical form, but a poetic recitation. Today, however, it is commonly conceived of as an Urdu, Hindi or Punjabi song, with prime importance given to the lyrics.

Details of the form:

A poem of five to fifteen couplets.

The second line of each couplet in a Ghazal ends with the repetition of a refrain of one or a few words, preceded by a rhyme (though in a less strict Ghazal the rhyme does not need to precede the refrain immediately).

In the first couplet, which introduces the theme, both lines end in the rhyme and refrain.

There can be no enjambment across the couplets in a strict Ghazal; each couplet must be a complete sentence (or several sentences) in itself.

Each of the couplet must be treated as a separate poem, thematically and emotionally complete in itself. This couplet is called a 'sher' in Urdu and Hindi.

All the couplets, and each line of each couplet, must share the same meter.

The last couplet may be (and usually is) a signature couplet in which the poet may invoke his/her name in the first, second, or third person.

After sex, I think time is our greatest obsession and what causes the greatest pain (besides religion :) The scholarly world (and thus the world culture) once believed in absolute and universal time. This is time defined by the movement of bodies in space flowing the same way for everyone and everyone sharing the same past, present and future. In absolute time, time and space are distinct; time never interacts with space (this is Newtonian time). It was Einstein (who, in school, was no Einstein) who dismantled this myth of absolute and universal time with his theory of relativity. In Einsteinian time, time is relative and dependent on the motion of the observer. In Einsteinian time, time and space are interrelated and complementary; when time stretches out, or slows down, space contracts. “Shrinking space changes into lengthening time.”

Einstein once said, in response to his friend’s death, “Now he has departed from this strange world a little ahead of me. That signifies nothing. For us believing physicists the distinction between past, present and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion.” For the modern physicist, at least, time is now motionless in an infinite gaze (which is different for the Buddhist, by the way, because motionless implies a reality that is also independent! Time’s absolute nature, according to Buddhism, is its emptiness, that is, its lack of inherent existence).

So, what’s my point? I have no point, that’s my point. Everything we have been talking about here on the blog from the moment God said to Noah, “If George Bush hasn’t beat me to it, I am going to put an end to all people, for the earth is filled with violence because of them, and besides, I’m getting bored of video games. I am surely going to destroy both them and the earth, and especially that place on Second Ave. with the bad sushi. Oh, yeah, and Sam Harris. So make yourself a blog of biodegradable virtuality; make rooms in it and coat it with photos inside and out. This is how you are to build it: The blog is to be infinitely long, wide and high, and well you’re a kid and know more about the internet than I do, you’ll figure it out. I am going to bring floodwaters on the earth to destroy all life under the heavens, every creature that has the breath of life in it. Everything on earth will perish. But I will establish my covenant with you, and you will enter the blog—you and your community of strangers with you.” Everything spoken of here in this ark park-- intersubjectivity, relationship, intimacy, transference, reification, etc.-- comes down to time or, rather, our belief in it as absolute and universal.

“Time, like space, exists only in relation to our experience; it is a concept linked to a perceptible change.” And so, take away conventional or clock time, and there is no space for time to exist in; take away space and there are no longer concepts that, because of time and space, exist as convention.
Step outside of past, present and future and you have a fourth time, which lies outside “duration.” From the perspective of meditation, in the purest instant of presence, you will recognize mind’s “empty and luminous nature” within the transparency of the world. “Here,” in the true mode of existence, you rise beyond any concept of motion and space, movement and being, or motionless and not being, the One and the Many, birth and death, and all the suffering between.

Thanks for the mashup on time Om. But because our understanding of events is governed by the relationships among those observed (or not observed) events, it does not mean that we live in a universe of chaos. Einstein's work is predicated upon a belief (I think) that there is order if we know how to see it.

Tell us what's new in Beijing. It's been a while.

I really love this form, particularly because of what you describe as, "Stopping at the end of the line. Completing the thought. Cherishing it, moving on." Also, "There can be no enjambment across the couplets in a strict Ghazal; each couplet must be a complete sentence (or several sentences) in itself.... Each of the couplets must be treated as a separate poem, thematically and emotionally complete in itself."

This is very powerful for me, the thought of interweaving themes and emotions finding their way to a gravitational center through the poem's totality.

This really appeals to me creatively. And your `Wanderlust' is inspiring, especially given these parameters. When I have time :) I want to work on this.

The Sunflower's Execution

In stiff lonely autumn, the clouds sit low,
linger long like puffy pools of steel breath
falling below hard steps.
So murderous the silence before wind.

My body slept scared in the empty field,
shivered amid the brown broken bodies
calling from dark depths,
my friends rotting in the stench of decay.

I sought the early days, bursting air with bud,
when I drew close my mother's draping rays
like milk, my body soaked in thick June mud,
grew hard before the weary fields laid bare
in moon's shadows.

My thinning, frail frame desperately stalked the earth
with fingers that couldn't dig deep enough;
stalling, my time had come.
What trick was played on me that lonesome night

that I was forced to perform my own death
a thousand times before the rain would cease?

My heavy yellow head, blurred, scarred, bent, stirred
in the air, in shadows from distant light,
crawling in the black breeze
against the drone of flightless birds in night.

My time had come, light hit the morning sky.

“The self that I ordinarily see,” says the aspirant, “—this is not Me; the world as it presents itself to me with its divisions and contradictions, this cannot be Real. With intellect alone, I remain outside of everything. I ask something in Nature what it is and receive as an answer only my own categories and classifications. Led from one thing to another, I do not grasp what is. `Who are you?’ – I might silently ask another, and as soon as I make a noise within myself, I fail to find the answer. Desires, needs, attachments well up within me and bind me to what I should not be.”

The Upanishads, as part of the Vedas, form a part of the Hindu scriptures. They primarily discuss philosophy, meditation, and the nature of God and form the core spiritual thought of Vedantic Hinduism. The Upanishads, also known as Vedānta, are considered the mystic strain and essence of the Vedas.

What is everyone doing tonight? What is everyone thinking and feeling? What is everyone wishing? Sometimes I wish that I could live a hundred lives at once to be here and there and slip inside someone else’s house and see what they are seeing, to hear what they are hearing. That’s why I love stories so much. I love to ease my feet into someone else’s slippers, if only for a moment. Are you in love tonight? Are you lonely? Are you dreaming?

I am in my small room. The hallway light in on but in my room the only light is the one illuminating the screen on my computer. I’d turn a lamp on, but my bird is asleep beneath the sheet that covers his cage. I am thinking about the wet laundry that I never moved to. the dryer – thinking about it, but not motivated into action. I am thinking about how moldy everything will smell if I wait much longer, which I probably will, because I am just dreaming tonight – lazy and dreaming, thinking about curling up in my bed and waiting for the cat to show up and walk her normal pattern around my feet, along my side, and onto my chest so that I can pet her.

Although it is no longer last night, I thought I would share. It is kind of grey today and I feel like Friday night has melted into just the quiet Saturday I needed. Last night I spoke to my sister on the phone for over three hours, I had to switch to my second cordless phone we spoke so long.

I lay on my bed, only half way changed. Wearing comfy jogging pants and the sweater I wore to work. As if I hadn't completely separated myself from the stresses of work and was too wiped out to take the effort to pull that layer of complexity off.

I was enjoying the time and the closeness, I was dreaming that she lived close enough for me to walk over and make a pot of tea and sit in the dark living room and just be ourselves. In the background her daughters were full of pent up energy and began to fight. A few minutes later they settled down for a movie and within the first few moments they burst out into a giggling fit. I gasp at the thought of them 20 years from now taking solace in each others voices at the end of a long week; and was grateful for our moment.

In an effort to find a way to heal and learn, to honor and support myself, and especially try to let go of judging myself I shared experiences and stories that I had never shared with her before. It was safe and welcoming and just seemed like the perfect moment to do so.

Siblings are such a special gift, you can be who you are, and share how you are feeling without having to share why--because they know you, all of you. And yet there is so much about you that they don't know and you haven't shared. Somehow that doesn't matter. There is a certain level of acceptance and understanding that you rarely get anywhere else. It is almost like they knew what you were going to say and say back, well of course you felt that way.

They have a skewed perspective of how you see yourself, the world sees you and they see you. With this perspective they can make light of the perceptions you struggle with, while still being empathetic.

I spend the morning playing brain age and doing a little bit of yoga. I decided to settle in on the couch and watch the movie, The Waitress, which reminded me of struggles I've experienced, the tenderness of others and the infinite power I hold inside. My second gift of the weekend- some great thoughts of inspiration, exactly what I needed to sit with and roll around in my mind to help me heal. And now I came to play to see how you were all doing.

I hope you get a chance to unwind and enjoy the rest of the weekend.

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